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 I'm loving Horizon, BUT...

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addiem0nster
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PostSubject: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 8:32 pm

Does Alice ever shut the //// up? They couldn't have tried any less when coding her totally random and constant voice files into the game. It's killing me how I'll buy a car, and as I'm driving it over to the garage, she'll tell me I SHOULD BUY A CAR. Or how she'll tell me about a showcase event, I'll be on my way to said showcase event, and she'll YELL AT ME FOR NOT DOING THE SHOWCASE EVENT. Why can't I turn her voice off??? And who wrote the lines for this game? Dolphin milk? It tries too hard to play the "random humor" card, and it falls flat on it's face every time. At least I can turn the stupid radio chatter off.

Please tell me Alice stops talking to you after you beat the campaign. PLEASE. Every time I hear her stupid voice it sends a jolt of rage up my spine to my brain and I throw my controller through a window while screaming at the top of my lungs and trying to eat my television.

Also aren't we past this stupid pre-race trash-talk bull////? Why can't they ever make a game where fellow racers are like,"Yo dawg, I like your ride. What you running in that thing?" I hate when racing games tack on a story and the only goal is to prove to the other stuck-up douchebags that you can drive. Race after race, you mop the floor with them and they still keep telling you your car is a box of //// or you can't drive or some other stupid spiteful garbage. Forza 4 had this great vibe of community, because it didn't have a story. Because when you race other people in FM4, they aren't dickbags. They're usually your friends, and you guys get along. I mean seriously, there can't be a single dude in Horizon who thinks you're an okay guy and just looks forward to a fun race?

"Did you know that the only way to get Johnny Dickburger out of bed is with a fire hose and a baseball bat?"

WHO GIVES A ////. THAT IS NEITHER INTERESTING OR FUNNY. It's like if I got on the radio and was like, "Did you know Robin Williams likes to drink coffee when he wakes up? He sure has a hard time getting up in the morning!" NO ONE CARES.

I get this game was made on a budget and fired out kinda quick, but Jesus H. Christ, if you're going to write a half-assed script, at least try. Just a little. Please.

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Smooth92
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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 8:38 pm

Tried to warn you.

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addiem0nster
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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 8:39 pm

Haha, I love the game itself, but goddamn, this is the worst script I've ever heard.

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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 8:41 pm

I know exactly what you mean.
After listening to the radio chatter I was close to slitting my own throat. The script is truly awful.

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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 8:43 pm

+1 and sorry to say that the bitch never shuts up. But, I'm married and learned how to tune out a woman's voice. lol
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addiem0nster
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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 8:44 pm

Wonderful.

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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 8:49 pm

I wanna kill that /////. I wish we could race her in the end of the game and have the chance to ram her off the road and end her.

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addiem0nster
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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 8:50 pm

I love being nearly finished with the game and having her tell me how to find events on my map.

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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 8:51 pm

TXSCHMIDT wrote:
+1 and sorry to say that the bitch never shuts up. But, I'm married and learned how to tune out a woman's voice. lol

Luckily you typed this out cuz i would have never heard you......Laughing

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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 9:02 pm

Byus millions worth of cars in the autoshow..."HEY I PAID YOU ALOOTA MONEY WHY DONT YOU DROP BY THE AUTOSHOW"

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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 9:09 pm

I also love how you get $459786234985732964853 just for drifting and crashing and going fast when you're not racing, but challenging your friends is like $1,000? Seriously? Why do the things that actually take skill payout like a paper route while spinning out and crashing through a fence and scraping against an SUV at full throttle "earns" you $10k+?

Has Playground made other games? I'm not sure they know how this works.

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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 9:44 pm

She will eventually NOT raep you, Addie.
I wish there was the option to drive over Alice with the Hummer.

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Smooth92
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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 9:47 pm

I agree with you guys 100% but lets clean up these posts.

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addiem0nster
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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 9:49 pm

Edited my swears.

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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 9:50 pm

addiem0nster wrote:
Edited my swears.

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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 10:00 pm

Hey, do you want to go to the showcase event, or should i find another driver. Alice makes my want to scalpe a kitten

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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 10:03 pm

RyanHappyHands wrote:
Hey, do you want to go to the showcase event, or should i find another driver. Alice makes my want to scalpe a kitten

that make me spit my soda out all over the screen!!!! poor little kittens...i just club baby seal when im angry...and punch babies...in church...during prayer...

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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 10:04 pm

I prefer to karate chop crippled chimpanzees.

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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 10:19 pm

Kru Jones wrote:
TXSCHMIDT wrote:
+1 and sorry to say that the bitch never shuts up. But, I'm married and learned how to tune out a woman's voice. lol

Luckily you typed this out cuz i would have never heard you......Laughing

I see what you did there. ... You mother fracker! lol
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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 10:38 pm

TXSCHMIDT wrote:
Kru Jones wrote:
TXSCHMIDT wrote:
+1 and sorry to say that the bitch never shuts up. But, I'm married and learned how to tune out a woman's voice. lol

Luckily you typed this out cuz i would have never heard you......Laughing

I see what you did there. ... You mother fracker! lol

LMAO...took ya long enough...

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TXSCHMIDT
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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 10:42 pm

Yeah, I'm like a train. Slow but, once I'm rolling I'm unstoppable! Mad
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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 10:43 pm

TXSCHMIDT wrote:
Yeah, I'm like a train. Slow but, once I'm rolling I'm unstoppable! Mad

Well Choo-Choo to you sir!!!!

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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 10:47 pm

It's Choo-Choo followed by a Woot-Woot to you sir!!!
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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Tue Mar 05, 2013 10:50 pm

Don't care how annoying she is, I'd still get it.

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PostSubject: Re: I'm loving Horizon, BUT...   Wed Mar 06, 2013 12:04 am

Volkswagen Yo wrote:
Don't care how annoying she is, I'd still get it.

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